I often see articles online or in magazines such as Real Simple talking about finding balance in one's work and personal lives, and I often have to laugh because my profession is so decidedly unbalanced. The last couple of weeks, I've been putting in quite a few 12 hour days, barely eating at home, driving all over the place to rehearse, and cramming in things like grocery shopping and laundry whenever I can. I haven't had a day free of rehearsing, performing, or teaching since February. And, as crazy as March has been, I just accepted to play on another concert next month and April is looking much the same. I'll admit, I'm at the point where I'm sometimes a little cranky and would love to just have a day off already, but I'm not sure that I would actually change anything. My husband, by the way, has been a saint through this time, and took over more than his share of cooking and cleaning during one of my really crazy weeks.
My job is such that I find some of the normal rules of work-life balance don't apply. Sure, what I do absolutely is work and a long day of playing and teaching can totally take it out of me. But conversely, I get a rush from making music together with my colleagues and friends, or seeing my students improve and grow. It seems strange, but I often go into work tired after having practiced all morning (you know that sleepy 2pm hump), only to finish teaching refreshed and re-energized at 8:30pm. I think of it as my teaching second wind. There is something about doing creative work that is rejuvenating and self-sustaining.
On the other hand, there's a thin line between between being active in performing and getting burned-out, and I've experienced both in my own life. I think I've gotten a lot better at carving out down-time for myself so that I can still enjoy playing and teaching and not become an over-scheduled zombie. If my playing starts to suffer or if I'm not able to be present and reliable for my students, I know I've taken on too much or not the right kind of projects. I also have certain non-negotiables, such as always eating a healthy breakfast, working out regularly, stretching, and coffee dispersed at well-timed intervals.
This past weekend, I played Schubert's Arpeggione Sonata on Friday at SIUE and then Sunday at Christ Church Cathedral in downtown STL. I had never performed that piece before, and I've enjoyed learning it. The Schubert is really different from other solo pieces I have played. For viola, people sometimes think of it as an "easy piece", because advanced high schoolers can play it, but for me it challenged some aspects of my playing that I didn't even know needed work. It's one of the closest things we have to a Mozart sonata, in that it's very exposed, somewhat virtuosic, and sounds absolutely wretched if played even slightly out of tune. I'll admit, I've discovered through playing this piece that I really am a late 19th Century/20th Century girl at heart. It has taken me a lot longer to bond with this piece than with many others I have played, but I have a lot of fun playing it and am happy to check it off my viola life list. My pianist, Kris, is always fun to work with, and some of trickier passages were easier when I could just bounce off of his phrasing and match his articulations. The view was nice too. Here's a photo from the back wall. Viola angel!
On Saturday, I was at the CMS for around 7 hours, rehearsing and playing for the Young Composer's Competition. To be honest, I was surprised how much I enjoyed each of the pieces. With student composers, there are at usually at least a few clunkers or just annoying uncomfortable string writing, but these pieces were all inventive, had interesting effects, and were sensitively scored. Plus, it was fun getting to talk with the composers a bit and they were are very nice and appreciative of our work. And there was a reception. Always love a reception.
Speaking of food, we are hosting a potluck on Easter, which will be my only day off in the last 4 weeks or so, and I'm super-excited. I love cooking, and I love planning big meals for when I get a bit of down-time. I'm quite type-A and began planning the menu for this year's Thanksgiving feast in August. I'm Martha-freaking Stewart about 3 times a year. Like, look at this tablescape. I'm never going to actually do this, but to know that someone else is living their life balance for me just makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
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